Posted in Book Reviews, Living BOLD, My Faith

“Unplanned” the Movie – I Finally Watched It…

As I’ve experienced a traumatic miscarriage, I hesitated. I convinced myself I couldn’t handle, avoiding it at all costs. But now I’ve watched it, and I’ll never be the same again.

My Reaction

To be honest, it wasn’t as bad as I had imagined, but I felt severely nauseous the entire time. I am so thankful for the woman, Abby, who was brave enough to share her story with the world.

“Unplanned” the Movie, 2019

No one should be badgered into keeping quiet about injustice. No one should be threatened for telling the truth. Abortion is murder, but abortion is also a deceitful lie that needs to be rebuked.

Abortion

Abortion is NEVER the answer!! Putting a child up for adoption at least gives them a chance to live!

Keeping your baby will bless you in a way can’t even imagine right now. No financial hardships or multitude of diapers can compare with how much that child will love you, and how much you love them.

Photo by Marko Tuokko on Pexels.com

My Story

Having lost a baby myself, through miscarriage, the scene where the woman, Abby, loses her baby and tissue fell out in the bathroom, hit me hard.

That was me. After two days of cramping, spotting, and an ultrasound, the dreaded moment came anyway.

My Baby, Timothy Lyle Babbitt, 9 wks. 6 days.
He was born on May 9, 2016.

I woke up in a pool of blood, screamed, “No God, NO!!” over and over again. I ran to the bathroom and my precious baby fell out of me. I went into shock and shook on the bathroom floor.

My husband took me to the ER, but not before I told him he was not allowed to flush that toilet.

They let me cry and talk to a nurse, but basically gave me strong ibuprofen and sent me home. I lost a baby, and that was it.

The Filthiest Burial

I was thankful for the doctor telling me not to try to find my baby – too tiny to find. I think that would have been even more traumatic for me.

Instead, my precious baby boy was buried by a flush, and taken to the sewer system. This memory haunts me to this day.

My Story
https://www.westbowpress.com/en/bookstore/bookdetails/800343-the-miscarriage-project

This Has to Stop!

But to think someone would choose that on purpose, kills my heart every time. No one comes away from losing a baby the same. Either way the baby dies, the mother will never be the same.

Pray abortion clinics close for good. Pray abortions become illegal. But also pray for those who’ve aborted or contributed to abortions. God’s forgiveness is more than enough for them too.

Check out unplannedfilm.com or fortydaysforlife.com for more resources and information to make a difference!

Also, to read more on the subject, check out my previous blog post: Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month.

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Posted in Living BOLD, My Books, My Faith

Book Release Party ~ Reflections

Hooray! My first ever book release party is in the books!

Thank you Erin for helping me set up my display!! It looked great!!

Thank You

First, I want to give a special thank you and shout out to Eric and Kristen Meeter, owners of Pressed Studio + Store in downtown Spencer. You both were an amazing couple to work with, and am so thankful for your wisdom, guidance, and hospitality.

Second, I want to thank Bri Schubert, owner of Bri Lifestyle Photography, for capturing the evening on film. Those pictures to come later, but so thankful for her willingness to be a part of the night.

with Bri Schubert

Last but not least, I want to thank my friends and family, as well as everyone else who was in attendance. As the author, I was so blessed to see the faces of those who the book will be impacting and I pray it is a blessing to each and everyone who reads it.


Reflection

As I reflect on the events of last night’s book release party, I find myself both joyous and thankful, as well as resistant and distant to God. Let me explain why.

The Due Date

As some of you know, yesterday was not only the book release party, but it was also my son’s due date, three years ago. Some asked if I did this on purpose, but I myself didn’t realize it until after the event had been scheduled.

When I realized the common date, I felt this sense of awe and deep sadness. What a better way to honor his memory, on his due date anniversary, than to share his story, our story, to those who need it most.

As a grieving mom, I am so thankful for the growth and healing that has taken place since then.

Vulnerable to Resentment

Yet, there is still part of me that is vulnerable, angry, and resentful. Just because I published a book about my experience, does not mean I stopped struggling with these feelings.

No matter how much I’ve already written about our miscarriage, it still stings. No matter how many times I’ve poured my heart and soul out, sharing with someone, there is still a somberness that remains. Can anybody relate?

Have in Common

As I was talking to several women and couples at the signing, I began to see a pattern among their experiences.

Not so Comforting Words

First, words from others can be more hurtful than helpful. If you haven’t been through it, don’t pretend to understand. Don’t try to fix it – because let’s face it, you’re not God – and you can’t.

Never assume it’s anyone’s fault but Satan, the deviser of evil, destruction, death, and despair. Who are you to know the true reason a baby dies? Who are you to yoke someone in despair, with an impossibly heavy burden?

Husbands

From many women I’ve talked to, several have made comments about their husbands or significant other’s reaction to the miscarriage.

Sadly, many say their husband dismisses it and disregards the wife’s feelings about the loss of their child.

After talking to my husband on several occasions, I have some compassion for these dads. My husband explained he didn’t get a chance to bond with our son. As such, his grieving looked much different than mine, and lasted much less time.

However, I urge husbands to have compassion on your wives. Don’t push her away because you are afraid to be vulnerable with her, or to seem weak. She needs to see you are hurting, so she knows she isn’t alone. You are the father, you are the only one she can truly share this baby with, and the loss of them.

A Success

To be honest, I have struggled for weeks with anxiety and worrying about this release party. Not because of anything circumstantial, but simply because of my inner struggle.

Yesterday, I was finally about to put that to rest. Those who attending the party blessed me with their stories and support. I am truly thankful for the treasure God produced out of our tragedy.

*I dedicate the party and this post to our son. We love you Sweetheart!*